Chapter 2: Waiting for Morayo

I just shake head, smile wey no reach my heart.

I rub my palm for trouser, na so my hand dey tremble. If anybody know whether we knack, na me.

Since we start IVF, Morayo dey extra careful, dey remind me say doctor no dey allow any form of sex during IVF.

I remember as she dey always talk am with seriousness. "Doctor talk say if person mistakenly get belle while dey use drug, e go scatter hormone, e go hard to keep the pregnancy."

I tap her nose: "So you dey obey doctor like this?"

I dey tease her small, but I dey proud of her. She catch my meaning, lean for my chest, pout: "Of course, but na you I dey obey pass, Doctor."

She dey always get that stubborn smile, eyes bright like early morning sun for dry season. Once she start the injection, she even dey waka like who dey hold egg for belle, dey tiptoe everywhere.

I dey look am sometimes, laugh, tell her make she relax. Na me come dey encourage her: "Just dey live normal, nothing go happen."

Her reply dey always make me feel say I dey important for her life. Na small small things like that dey sweet marriage.

Now, dem dey talk say she knack seriously with another person just before egg retrieval?

My mind dey tumble, I no fit believe am.

The egg retrieval fail, dem end the procedure early.

Nurse and orderly just dey waka pass, I no even see anybody. I dey lost for thought.

Morayo dey wheel out.

Anesthesia still hold her, she never wake.

Even as powder no dey her face, she still fine pass all those Instagram girls.

I dey look her face, my mind dey wander.

Her eyelash long, lips just dey there like person wey sleep for peace. I dey imagine wetin dey go on for her own mind. I dey pray inside me make this wahala no scatter our marriage.

I meet Morayo for arranged meeting for one buka in Ibadan.

That day hot, everywhere dey buzz, aroma of amala and ewedu dey everywhere. We suppose meet by 5:30, but one of my patient get sudden wahala after surgery—her belle block, I run do emergency operation, move her to emergency ward. Na when she stable I rush go restaurant.

Before, if na this kind situation, my arranged date go don vex comot.

But that day, Morayo just sit down, no complain, just smile, pour me zobo.

Her understanding touch my heart.

No be small thing for woman to wait for man without vex, especially for this our obodo. Plus, na my spec she be: black pencil skirt show her shape, lips red like zobo drink, she be art teacher—fine and romantic.

Everything I dey find for woman, she get am.

Omo, I fall for her sharp sharp.

Her laugh dey ring for my ear like bell for mosque on Friday. Three months after, we marry. For pikin, we say make we just dey try, e go happen. But after one year, no belle.

As I dey medicine, I know say something fit dey wrong for one side.

Who get the problem? Na only test go show.

At first, she no wan do test. "We never reach, make we wait small."

Her voice dey shake, her eyes dey dodge my own, as if she dey hide something. I no gree: "For Nigeria, if couple dey try for one year, no belle, dem don dey call am infertility."

I talk am softly, rub her back make she no feel attacked. I tell her make she no worry. "If wahala dey, we go treat am. If no wahala, we go just relax, e go help."

When test time reach, she finally open up. For university, her first love get her belle, but e turn to ectopic pregnancy, dem comot one fallopian tube.

I hold her hand tight as she dey talk am, tears just dey drop from her eye like tap. "When I do surgery, doctor talk say even with one tube, person fit still get belle. I no suppose hide am, but I dey fear say if you hear, you no go fit accept, you go leave me... Husband, I no fit live without you..."

That day she dey cry, e touch me.

I wipe her tears, hug her, whisper for her ear say make she no fear. Na that time, I just forgive her. All of us get past.

Plus, she swear say since she and her ex break, she never talk to am again.

She even show me her ex WhatsApp: "I no delete am because I no send. If you want, I go delete am now."

I no even send.

Me sef get my first love number for phone.

If I dey complain, e go be like say I too petty.

I smile, rub her back. "No wahala, Morayo. Na you I choose. Past na past."

Later, we try another year, still no belle. Na Morayo suggest IVF.

Me, I still dey reason am. "Make we check whether the other tube dey open?"

I dey believe for natural things pass.

But IVF na artificial.

Morayo no gree. "Abeg, make we do am. The more we wait, the harder e go be."

Her voice dey strong, her face dey set. I look her face, dey pity her small: "You no dey fear pain?"

She hug me: "I dey fear, but when I think say I go born your pikin, I no dey fear again. I love you pass myself, na why I wan get pikin tie you down... You go look down on me say I no be those strong women? I no send, I just wan be wife wey you dey pamper."

She just kiss me, I melt. I give her my ATM card straight.

Na so my heart soft. My own be say, if my wife dey suffer, na me suppose pay for everything.

Maybe na her good mind help am.

Other women dey do IVF, dem dey look tired, but Morayo dey dress fine every day. Na only waka she dey waka like say she dey guard egg for belle.

Her make-up dey neat, her wrapper dey always sit well, sometimes she go even tie gele come hospital. I really respect her for that.

Remembering the surgery this morning—last night, I even wan swap night shift to stay with her.

But she say if I do that, e go give her pressure, fit make her no sleep, and e fit spoil today operation.

Who go believe say, for such important time, na another man she go meet?

My mind dey choke, as I dey think am, everything wey no balance get reason. Her behaviour no really be like woman wey dey do IVF.

With this thought, my mind dey hot, I nearly walk out, leave her to wake alone face everything.

I dey fight myself, try calm down, but anger dey my throat like yam wey no gree go down. As wife, she do me strong thing. Before I go divorce her make she go free, I no go let am go like that.

I pick her phone, unlock am with her fingerprint, check her WhatsApp chat. Nothing suspicious, even chat wey dem clear, I no see.

I open her ex WhatsApp.

Last month, her ex wish her happy birthday, she no reply.

I check his status—he post family picture, she no comment, she no like.

As man, I know say no be her ex she meet last night.

My chest dey rise and fall, I dey sigh. My head dey pain me. Who be the person wey spend the night with her?

As I dey look her pale face, small snore just escape her nose. I sit down, carry hand support my chin, dey wait make she wake. For my mind, I dey pray say God go show me light for this darkness. Na so my heart dey heavy, but I no go rush accuse until I hear from her mouth. But as I dey wait, my mind dey race—wetin I go hear fit scatter my life or bring peace. I no sure which one I dey ready for.