Chapter 4: Kindness for Sale

Savannah burst into tears.

Her sobs echoed around the classroom, dramatic and loud. Someone ran to get the nurse. I felt a cold pit open in my stomach—somehow, this would be blamed on me, too.

I stood there helpless, but Tyler freaked out.

He hurried over and grabbed Savannah’s hand. “You okay?”

Before I could apologize, he stood in front of Savannah again, shielding her, and yelled at me:

“Lila, are you done yet!”

His voice was sharp, slicing through the noise. I shrank back, my hands trembling. Everyone watched, waiting for me to snap.

I stared at him blankly, then took two steps back.

“I didn’t touch Savannah. And the scholarship was supposed to be mine.”

My voice was barely audible, but it was the truth. I could see the disbelief in his eyes, the way he refused to hear me.

Tyler’s face darkened.

He stood in front of Savannah, who was still crying, like some kind of knight, and said:

“What would you even do with it? Isn’t it just to treat your nasty disease?”

Wow—

The whole class erupted.

Laughter, whispers, the snap of someone’s gum. Heat rushed to my face. It felt like I was on stage, exposed, with nowhere to hide.

I tried to stop him, pleading softly, “Please, stop.”

“It’s just facts. You’ve been itching for months. You think cash is gonna fix that?”

“I’m begging you.” I grabbed his sleeve, but he jerked away.

He ignored how pale I’d gotten and just kept going.

“Savannah’s kind, and those kittens out back are about to have babies. This money’s for their rescue. You think your gross problem matters more than them?”

Next thing I knew,

The class, quiet for a beat, exploded into chaos.

Everyone’s eyes on me were full of scorn.

Their words were sharp and loud.

“Didn’t think Lila looked so proper, but she’s got some weird disease. No wonder I felt itchy after touching her.”

“People like her should just drop out—why do we have to deal with her?”

“She acts all innocent, but she’s so nasty behind the scenes.”

Tyler hadn’t expected them to take it that far.

He hesitated for a second, watching me sit back down, head bowed, trembling.

He coughed, looking uneasy.

“Lila, I didn’t mean it like that.”

Before he could finish, I nodded quietly.

“Fine, the scholarship’s hers.”

My voice was flat, beaten down. I pressed my hands into my lap, hoping no one could see them shake.

Last time, Savannah went through my backpack while I was in the bathroom.

She took a liking to the only birthday gift my mom ever bought me—a nice pen.

She wanted to take it right then.

I refused.

Later, when I got back from gym, I found out Tyler had tossed the pen straight into the school dumpster.

It was ruined.

After that, I didn’t dare say no to Savannah about anything.

She didn’t like my thick, long hair. After homework club, she chopped it into a jagged bob.

She didn’t like my skin being paler than hers.

So she sprinkled itching powder all over my desk.

I put up with it all.

But about my illness, I only told Tyler.

Now, everyone’s stares and snickers stabbed into me like pins.

I sat stiffly, clutching my shirt, not arguing anymore.

Seeing me fold so easily, Tyler walked over and patted my head.

“Lila, just be good. If you really need it, I…”

His voice was soft, almost like he was humoring a little kid. I stared straight ahead, refusing to meet his eyes.

Before he could finish, Savannah suddenly collapsed beside him.

Someone shouted, “The class queen fainted!”

“Ty, my stomach hurts.”

Tyler immediately panicked. He helped Savannah back to her seat.

He skipped physics to get her hot water from the hall.

He went to the vending machine for a heat pack.

Even during break, he ordered delivery for her favorite plush toy.

Savannah blushed and thanked him, always clutching his sleeve, refusing to let him go.

I sat not far away, quietly watching, my heart burning like it was full of fire ants.

All of this, I’d taught him.

But he’d never done any of it for me.

When I almost fainted from cramps during gym, Tyler hadn’t helped me once.

He just stood far away in the corner.

That day, he texted:

“You feeling better?”

“An eighteen-year-old guy like me can’t do this stuff, I’d get roasted.”

“When I’m twenty-eight and marry you, then I’ll have the right to.”

After that, I never begged him for help again.

I stopped watching that sweet scene across the room.

I counted the minutes until class ended, desperate to get to my part-time job.

This month, Mom and I were still short on rent.

As soon as the bell rang and I was about to leave, Tyler stopped me.

“Wait. You haven’t apologized to Savannah for today.”

I just thought he was being ridiculous.

“Let go of me!”

He grabbed me hard and shoved me. “I said, apologize!”

I hit the floor hard.

Pain shot through my lower body, and my jeans were instantly stained red.

A passing classmate screamed, covered their mouth in disgust, and jumped away.

“Ew, that’s so gross—even bleeding. What if she gets everyone sick!”

In a heartbeat, all my classmates glared at me.

I don’t know who started it.

Backpacks, pencil cases, sharp compasses—all rained down on me.

Tyler just held Savannah and watched coldly from the side.

“Lila, apologize to Savannah.”

“You scared her today, and now you’ve made yourself so gross.”

“Your disease—it’s not contagious, right?”

I took a shaky breath, wiping blood from my face, scratched by a compass.

I crouched down, hugging my head.

“Sorry,”

“Sorry.”

“It’s my fault for not appreciating kindness.”

Maybe my weakness made everyone lose interest.

The crowd scattered, looking awkward.

I gritted my teeth, stood up, and bolted from the room.

“Lila!”

Tyler chased after me.

I ran faster and faster.

The wetness at the corners of my eyes stung my wounds like salt.

When I got home,

Mom was sitting by the bed, holding that little tin box, counting money.

When she saw me come in, she stood up, worried.

“Lila, have you eaten?”

“I’ve eaten.”

I forced a smile.

But suddenly, a look of pain flashed across Mom’s face.

I quickly found an excuse to hide in my room.

Closing the door, I leaned against it, listening to her muffled sobs outside.

My eyes quietly turned red.

Last year, Mom wasn’t like this—a shell of herself.

Listening to her cry, I bit my lip until it bled.

It was all my fault.

Suddenly, a thunderstorm started outside the window.

Raindrops hammered the old window screen like bullets.

It was suffocating.

That night, it rained even harder than this.

Mom was worried about me, so she planned to pick me up after homework time.

The alley was too dark.

A drunk was hiding in the corner…

When I got home, Mom was hiding in the bathroom, washing for a long time.

Covered in bruises.

She told me she just fell.

After that, she lost her job.

People in the neighborhood all said she had a dirty disease.

I didn’t believe it,

Fought with those women all the time.

Until the day I got my period.

My jeans were dirty, but no one told me.

My embarrassing moment was caught by Savannah and spread in the class group chat.

Tyler even hid the pads I kept in my desk to make her laugh.

I could only rush home to change.

It was too dark inside, so I put on Mom’s underwear.

After that,

I got sick too.

But I didn’t dare tell her.

Afraid she’d break down.

I kept thinking, when the scholarship came, I could go to the clinic for medicine.

But now, the money was gone.

The sound of rain slowly faded.

The crying outside stopped too.

I lowered my head and quickly opened the door, not daring to look at her.

“Mom, I’m going to work.”

At the entrance of the new smoothie shop,

I ignored my empty stomach, wearing a heavy mascot head, handing out flyers on a nearly 100-degree day.

Sweat poured down, and my body started itching unbearably again.

I felt so uncomfortable I wanted to double over.

But the mascot head slipped off.

When I looked up, two familiar figures stood in front of me.

Tyler and Savannah.

They were hugging and kissing right in front of the store.

I froze in place.

Last time during homework hour, the whole school suddenly lost power.

In the dark, Tyler pulled me into the hallway.

That was the first time he kissed me.

Warm breath, the scent of mint, a shy kiss.

Tyler’s face was just inches from mine.

His eyelashes brushed my cheek, tickling.

“Lila, when we graduate, let’s be together.”

“And then never, ever separate, okay?”

I nodded, panicked, not wanting to let go of his hand.

I always thought he, like me, would keep his promise.

Turns out, it was just wishful thinking.

——

I hurriedly picked up the mascot head, but heard Savannah shriek.

“Why is Lila here!”

I wanted to run, but Savannah grabbed me.

She held Tyler’s arm, stood in front of me with red eyes, and pointed at me.

“Ty, doesn’t Lila have some gross disease? If she’s handing out flyers here, everyone will get infected.”

“I’m telling the manager.”

She turned and ran.

I panicked,

This was my last shot at making money. If I couldn’t pay rent, Mom and I would be out on the street.

“No!”

I grabbed her hand, but she screamed and shook me off!

The flyers blew away in a sudden gust.

Hearing the noise, the manager came out.

I froze, watching Tyler help Savannah explain everything, word by word.

Savannah giggled and nodded, glancing at me with a cold sneer.

“Don’t come again.”

The manager tossed two days’ pay—twenty bucks—on the ground.

Every way I had to make money was gone.

“Bitch.”

I couldn’t help but spit at Savannah.

She immediately covered her face and cried.

“Ty, you know, I was just being kind, hoping Lila would get better before coming to work.”

“I was thinking of everyone’s safety. Was I wrong?”

She sobbed, tears streaming down her face.

I looked in disbelief at Tyler’s angry face.

“Lila!”

He snatched the envelope with my pay.

He raised his hand and hurled it into the pond next to the shop.

“Are you so broke you can’t live? If you love money so much, go fish it out of the pond!”

“And apologize to Savannah! She’s being kind and thinking of you. Why don’t you appreciate it!”

I just wanted to jump in after it, but he held me back tight.

“Apologize!”

With a thud, I dropped to my knees.

“Sorry!”

“Sorry.”

“It’s my fault for not appreciating kindness.”

Tyler was stunned and let go of me.

Even though it was a blazing summer day, I felt cold all over.

The cicadas buzzed in the trees, the heat pressed down, but I shivered. I wiped my eyes and stood up, my dignity left somewhere on the sidewalk. I wondered if this was the moment I’d finally disappear for good.