Chapter 1: The Game Begins

Me and my wife Sade waka enter her class reunion, and from gate, everywhere just dey buzz. Dem talk say make everybody off phone—serious game dey ground, Truth or Dare wey be like judge dey for court. As we enter, the parlour heavy with perfume, fried meat, and the sweat from cold malt bottles. Plastic chairs dey clatter, Burna Boy dey play low, but nobody dey dance—na teeth dem dey shine, gist dey whisper for corner, tension dey choke like Lagos traffic. Na her people, na their wahala. For Naija, once old friends gather, na so old wound dey show.

I still dey observe the room when my turn reach for the game. Na that exact time, call enter my phone. Sade eye flash, her hand shake small before she grab my phone—anger and fear mix for her eye—before she vex slam am for ground.

The phone bounce one kind, hit tile, battery scatter everywhere. All eye turn face us, some even open mouth. Sade no send, she hold her waist, dey boil. As for me, my chest just dey beat kpai kpai. Na so person go take disgrace you for front of her people?

"So na like this you busy? Who you dey try impress?"

I just dey look the screen as e go black. "Na my papa call. He talk say my mama just get heart attack now now..."

My voice shake small, my hand cold. I see as everybody eye change. That kain call no be play. Even the jollof for table lose colour for my eye.

My wife freeze, her jaw tight. "Which kind talk be that one?"

She eye me up and down like say I dey do magic show. For her mind, maybe na another lie I dey cook. I fit feel the wahala for her body—pride dey war with sense.

As I dey think about wetin I just hear, fear catch me. I hold her arm, beg am. "We gats go. At her age, heart attack no be play."

My mind dey race, dey count how long e go take reach house, rush go hospital. I dey try hold myself, but my hand dey shake. Some people for the party just dey look us dey wait drama.

One Lagos babe wey dey relax for sofa just laugh. "If you no fit handle the game, abeg, go house. We sef no too want make you dey here, truth be say, Bayo go soon show."

She cross leg, sip wine, the kind confidence only Lagos babe fit get. Everybody begin titter. I notice say dem dey shine teeth, dey enjoy the drama pass the game.

As she mention that name, Sade hand grip cup, her face stiff. I notice, but I no talk. Na small I hear am, but I see as Sade face change. E be like cold breeze enter the room. I catch the look wey pass between the babe and my wife. Old gist dey ground.

The babe add, "Oya, follow your husband go house. Heart attack? Abeg, na because e dey fear see your first love."

Na so the room scatter with laughter. The kind laughter wey dey pepper for ear. Even one guy clap hand, shout like say dem just see skit.

One guy come talk, "Make I leak one secret—Bayo come tonight to confess."

Dem begin whisper, some dey form surprise. I see as Sade purse lip, shift leg. For my mind, na wetin be all this?

My wife shake my hand off. "I no dey go anywhere. Party just start, we never even chop. If you wan go, carry yourself waka."

She stand gidigba, her friends dey her back. For her mind, na me dey spoil groove. Some dey nod for her, dey throw face.

I dey panic. "Wetyn dey do you? You no understand say heart attack fit kill person sharp sharp? You still dey talk food? You dey craze?"

My voice don rise, my patience don scatter. People dey look me, some dey record. Na so Lagos life be, any small thing na content. My chest dey hot. Na my mama life I dey talk, but Sade still dey play madam for her clique.

She fire back, "Na you no get heart! All these na my padi dem, we grow together. Wetin I dey hide? I don talk am—if you wan go, go. No come disgrace me for here."

She face me, her voice loud. Some people dey nod, some dey shake head. I see as one babe dey eye me like say I be problem child. Na so e be when dem gather for reunion—one person must chop insult.

I try drag her go, but she just waka go join her people.

She squeeze her face, dust her shoulder, waka go her corner. I follow am with eye, but she no look my side again. Na pride full everywhere.

"I go talk am again: heart attack no be beans. E fit kill person. Abeg, follow me go house."

I dey plead, my eye red. I dey talk to her, but na like say wall dey between us. The room dey feel smaller, people dey close in, dey expect next episode.

"You dey dream!" she shout. "Na so you wan make I believe that kain lie? Wetin I do you reach this one? Person no fit enjoy small?"

She roll eye, snap finger. For that moment, e be like say we no even marry. Some guys dey form hype-man, dey ginger her.

I pick my phone, dey press every button, but screen no gree on.

My finger dey run like rat, but the phone stubborn. Glass don scatter. Na small time remain make I tear up. I dey pray make miracle happen.

Her classmates just dey laugh anyhow, dey look me like say I be clown.

Dem dey form squad, dey throw shade. "See as e dey do, e no fit handle Sade." One short guy even snap picture, whisper joke.