Chapter 5: Dispatch, Status Updates, and Everlasting Rose

As we really break up, bullet comments just scatter everywhere:

[Wetin happen? I never check update for days—how guy and babe take break up?]

[Na wah. Na those boys dey ginger am again. All of them dey single, no wan make another person happy.]

[The guy comot from him boys' umbrella, only to find say e no dey rain outside. See as e funny.]

[Continue—if he really break up with the babe, him boys go dey rush to chase her.]

[Babe, stand gidigba! No let any man use your heart do playground.]

As the likes dey climb, I wonder who really dey celebrate—me, or them wey dey wait for drama.

As I dey read am, na like say I dey inside reality show. My chest dey heavy, but my face dey strong.

If I talk say e no pain me, na lie. After all, relationship of years no be beans. But I no fit allow myself scatter again. I still get my life.

For my mind, I dey count all the small small sacrifices wey I do for the relationship, dey try balance am with all the wahala.

I no believe all those bullet comments. Tobi boys never like me. Many times, dem go warn me for back, say I no reach Tobi level, dey push me make I leave am.

For Lagos, everybody dey carry matter for head, but only few go tell you truth. All those boys, na competition dem dey do.

Worst one na when Sani corner me, dey ask wetin I see for Tobi. I think say he dey screen for him padi, so I just talk nonsense—say na money I dey find, say I like rich guys.

That day still dey my mind. Sani eye dey shine like person wey catch thief. I talk anyhow make e comot.

After that day, Sani begin wear two big wristwatches every day. I think say na mock me, so I sef yarn am, call am peacock, ask am if him family don bankrupt, na why he dey model watch. Sani vex, remove the watches the next day.

But now, after reading bullet comments, I dey reason am. I try post for WhatsApp status:

[Single again. Happy breakup.]

I pause, think say make I post, then I hit send, lock phone. For my mind, I dey expect maybe one or two likes, but I no prepare for the show.

Time don reach two in the morning. I think say nobody go notice. Next thing, my WhatsApp just full with likes. People wey never like my post before just dey like am.

As I dey count, na all Tobi boys dey like am. My heart dey bite small.

I count am—na all Tobi boys dey like am.

I refresh, new status pop up. Just one minute ago.

Sani: "24 years old, 6ft 2, 18+ (age correct), first class degree, no childhood sweetheart, no old flame, 10pm curfew, no like wahala or cold war, dey hear word, single, ready for relationship. I sabi cook, I sabi clean, I dey respect woman—who dey game?"

I burst laugh for bed, dey shake head. E clear say Naija boys sabi use small chance enter matter.

I remember that bullet comment about finding small puppy boyfriend, I click Sani profile.

I message: [Hello.]

My finger dey shake, but I laugh inside as I type am.

He reply sharp: [Make we date. I go post am for status now now.]

Me: [......]

[But I no come here to find boyfriend.]

He quick withdraw the message.

I see the notification disappear—guy no wan dull.

Sani: [Send to wrong person. Wetin you want?]

Me: [......]

[Tobi dey with you? Abeg tell am make he talk to me.]

He pause, then just scoff:

His reply slow, then e land like stone: [He no dey here. Wetin? You wan use me as messenger? I no be your couple referee.]

I explain: [No be so. Me and Tobi don break up. I just wan return him things.]

As I dey type, my heart dey beat fast. For my mind, I dey remember all the small small things wey Tobi leave for my house.

I no get any other way. After all these years, Tobi get plenty things for my side. Cup and towel no matter, but some get value, like ring and watch. I try send am by dispatch, but Tobi no dey house. The things cost, must sign for am. I no fit dey drag am, so I reason make I ask Sani help me.

[So una really break up.]

Somehow, Sani voice just soft, even small happiness dey hide inside:

I imagine say Sani dey smile as he type, dey try form coded, but the matter dey sweet am.

"Just send am by dispatch. He dey here."

I challenge am: "You just talk say he no dey here?"

Sani laugh small: "I talk am? I forget. I small pass Tobi by three years—young people dey forget."

Na old people dey forget, no be young.

I never even get chance talk, Sani don dey rush me make I send am quick. He even remind me:

His message land: [Remember make you choose pay on delivery. After breakup, no dey pay again.]

I just smile, dey shake head.

6.

I arrange dispatch. One hour later, dispatch send me video.

For the video, Tobi stand for middle, all him boys gather around:

All of them dey act like say na family meeting for compound. Their eyes full ground, dey yarn as if na them dey judge who right and who wrong.

"I talk am, how we go really break up? See, she dey send gifts to beg me."

Even as he dey run mouth, him tone dey sour:

You fit hear small hurt for voice, but e dey hide am under gra-gra.

"Tobi, you really get better babe—dey treat you like king. Wetin she see for your body?"

"True talk. If na money, all of us get am. If na fine boy, Sani fine pass you—him dey win campus fine boy every year."

The boys dey raise voice, dey pour more fire, as if dem dey audition for best padi of the year.

Tobi just dey hear dem, face strong, but small smile dey corner him mouth. He cough, form like say e no concern am:

He act like say him no care, but if you look well, you go see the pride dey struggle for inside.

"No need gift sef. If she just apologise, I go gree. I no be wicked person."

One guy no fit hold am: "Give me the gift then, I go pay you."

Tobi just change face: "No, na my babe give me. Nobody fit collect am."

He even look Sani for eye:

Small tension dey the air as Sani lock eye with am, but both of dem just bone face.

"Fine boy no mean say you go get love."

"I no even wan forgive Simi. This time she too pass her boundary."

His voice get edge, but e clear say e dey talk for people to hear.

"But, as I see say she dey try, I go forgive her last time."

"Tonight, I go pay for everything, make una no vex say I waste una time."

Everybody just tire for him fake generosity, but dem no get choice.

As dem dey mutter, one or two just shake head, but nobody gree talk am out.

Only Sani look the box, no vex at all, even talk:

He just dey observe, mouth twist: "Pay the dispatch guy first. He get another package—no delay am."

True, the dispatch just dey wait, dey fear talk. Tobi pay, even dash am extra ten thousand naira. Dispatch just dey hail am boss.

For Naija, once you dash dispatch boy anything, na blessing full your head. The guy dey hail, dey rush go next delivery.

As he pay finish, Tobi rush open box:

His finger dey shake, face dey tight. Boys gather like say dem dey expect proposal.

"I sure say na tie. Simi work overtime three months save money buy me Valentine gift."

"I tell her say normal one dey okay, but she no gree. Sometimes, I no even know wetin to do with her."

"Eh? Na watch join, cufflinks—wait, why dem dey familiar..."

The more Tobi check, the more him face change. One by one, all the things wey get meaning to am dey show, last last, na one box with rose inside.

You fit see am for his face—memory dey flash back, eyes dey moist but e bone.

When our love still dey strong, Tobi give me bouquet of roses. I just play:

I remember the smell, how I tease am, dey laugh say na waste of money.

"I no want rose. Flower dey die, I no want our love to fade."

Tobi laugh that time:

His teeth shine, eyes bright: "Then I go give you rose wey no go ever wither."

He buy rare stone from auction, polish am by himself, set am with fine crystal and diamond, finally make this everlasting rose.

The box na the kind wey if you show your friend, dem go talk say you don see real love. I cherish am pass gold.

So I think say Tobi really love me.

I too simple that time, no know say love get weight. I no know say Tobi pride, suspicion, wahala, stubbornness, and sharp mouth all dey come before love.

Now I see say Naija love get as e be. If person no balance respect, wahala go full everywhere.

So, the rose no go ever die. But the person wey hold the rose fit drop am first.

As I dey look the rose for my hand, I just dey reason—sometimes, na peace of mind dey sweet pass love. Because now, freedom, respect and trust dey important to me pass love for Tobi.

I rest my head for wall, take deep breath. For Lagos, love dey, but sense suppose dey follow am. For this life, na me go first choose myself.