Chapter 6: Goodbye Abuja

5

For these three years, I don think of running plenty times. But I no expect say the day go reach so quick.

Sometimes I dey pack load for dream, but today, na real life. My hand dey shake, chest dey tight.

I pack sharp sharp. Apart from documents and small things, I no carry anything. Lanre treat me well, I save enough for me and my pikin to live.

I no touch his money again. All the jewelries, fine shoes—dem no mean anything. I only take wetin be my sweat.

I tell Mama Kemi say I dey go see my mama, make she no worry about dinner. The driver wan carry me, I no gree.

I no want drama. I just hug Mama Kemi, tell am say make she pray for me. She look me, nod. Old woman sabi see tori with her eye.

Taxi dey rush for road, pass Lanre Group headquarters, then my old school. As we dey wait for red light for school gate, I see Lanre’s black SUV from far.

My breath catch. That SUV big, always dey shine. For Abuja, na only three people get that kind number plate.

Just on reflex, I look inside. For one moment, I see Ronke lean on Lanre shoulder, close like say dem be one.

Her hand for his hand, head dey rest for his chest. They fit TV couple, na me dey outside looking in.

My heart just bitter. My mind flash memory—one Sunday, Lanre carry me go small buka, buy me fried fish and Fanta. E make me laugh till belle pain. For that moment, I believe say maybe I fit get love too. But now, pain just return sharp, like person pour hot pepper for wound.

No tears, but pain dey bite. I dey learn say love na game wey woman dey lose for silence.

I dey reason whether to tell Lanre goodbye. After all, he help me well when my mama dey sick. But as I see that scene, I know say e no get meaning. Ronke don come back, my waka better for both of us.

Sometimes goodbye no dey need mouth. Just vanish, let memory do the rest.

Before plane take off, Lanre call me. For three years, I dey always pick his call quick. But today, I just let am ring, then I off my phone and remove SIM card.

My hand dey shake as I pull SIM. Na small act, but na big freedom.

I know Lanre character. Pride full am—he no go call again. Just good; it give me time to run.

I trust say after one or two tries, he go forget. Na so Abuja men be.

As the plane climb, city lights fade under me till everything disappear.

My heart dey light small. I press face for window, whisper small prayer for myself.

Goodbye, Abuja.

Goodbye, Lanre.

For the first time in years, my spirit breathe.