Chapter 1: Coded Beginnings

For Lagos, 25 no be just number—na babe wey coded pass password. If you hear her gist, you go know say street get university.

For this city, name dey get meaning wey nobody fit decode. Sometimes, na number dem dey use, sometimes, na street nickname, sometimes, na just coded gist. As e be, 25 na coded babe. The kain person wey if you dey hear her gist for motor park, you go just dey nod your head like say you sabi life finish.

She be the first woman wey really enter my life.

Omo, for my chest, I dey reason say she dey scatter my head pass, but I never open mouth beg am make she leave that kind waka-waka life. My mind dey do like NEPA light—on and off, anyhow—when I think am. One kind wetin-wetin I no sabi name, na so I go just dey look ceiling for night. Na that time I realise say some things pass just ordinary mouth.

1

The year wey I finish university, na logistics company I dey work.

That year, the hustle strong. Na NYSC just finish, my khaki still dey soak inside bucket. For inside office, everybody dey run their lane, but na one of my colleagues, Uncle Auwalu, na local person wey dey always carry us go joint for karaoke.

Uncle Auwalu na original Kano man wey sabi every sharp corner for city. E no dey ever dull, every Friday, na him dey drag all of us go one coded place. One day, as we dey sing, line of young babes just waka enter, stand for door, dey wait make we choose.

Omo, I shock. That time, I never even get girlfriend before.

Na so my belle catch one kind cold. For my mind, I dey ask: Na so e dey be? Even before I fit settle, Uncle Auwalu nudge me, so I just point anyhow, one babe come waka come sit near me. As she see say I no dey talk, she just dey there dey crack groundnut.

She wear yellow lace top, slippers dey her leg—no stress, just coded fine. Na the sound of the groundnut shell dey tap for my ear, I dey reason how person fit dey comfortable for that kain coded scene.

My hand dey sweat, body dey shake. Uncle Auwalu come pat me for back, tell the girl, "This one na the university graduate for our office. Abeg, take care of am well."

Uncle Auwalu sabi package person. The way e dey introduce me, e be like say I be one big oga wey just come back from Yankee. Meanwhile, na pure water boy I still be.

"Ehen, na university you go?" the girl look me, smile. "Big boy with sense."

Her teeth white, her eye get that Lagos sharpness. She adjust skirt, cross leg, dey size me from hair go shoe. The way she talk, na half tease, half test.

"No, abeg, I no reach like that." My mouth dey jam. "How I go take call you?"

She just burst laugh, bend over, dey laugh well. "Which kind question be that? Just call me 25."

Her laugh loud, scatter table. She use hand cover mouth, dey shake. Na that kain laugh wey fit make person forget all e problem. For my mind, I dey wonder whether she dey whine me or she just dey shine her own.

I confuse as she dey use me catch cruise. Uncle Auwalu come rescue me, say make I sing duet of 'Nigeria My Beloved Country' with am. For my mind, I dey reason say this kind song no fit this place, so I tell am say I don drink too much Star, my head dey pain me.

The whole bar dey noisy, small generator dey hum for background, people dey shout. I dey reason how dem fit dey sing 'Nigeria My Beloved Country' for this kind coded joint. I just wan melt enter chair.

"You wan try quick one?" 25 just bend come whisper for my ear.

Her perfume choke me small, na cheap roll-on, but e sweet pass as e blend with her voice for my ear.

"Which one be quick one?"

25 talk something, but I no hear am well—the room too noisy. Uncle Auwalu dey hold one girl dey sing like say dem dey kill goat. 25 point the next room, I come understand.

Na then e clear me, as dem dey move one by one enter back room, coded coded. For that Lagos life, coded runs get hierarchy—this na the one wey no get receipts, no get story, everybody dey pretend say dem no see.

Some people no fit wait, dem don dey carry girl enter next room—for this kind coded arrangement wey no get show, dem dey call am "quick one."

Her eyes shine with small mischief as she raise three fingers, wave am for my face. Meaning clear: one quick one, three thousand naira.

Na that time my chest freeze. Salary never reach, probation still dey. I dey calculate how three thousand go fit run inside ten thousand plus. My mind dey run like danfo wey conductor dey drag passenger. To avoid shame, I laugh am off: "Abeg, today no go work, I no carry money come."

She look me up-down, see as my shoe and belt no match, then she just shake head. "Who dey go flex without money?" She hiss.

Her hiss carry as e loud reach my ancestors. The kain hiss wey you sabi say na real street babe. E pain me small but I just bone.

"Na true, if you no believe, check." I pat my pocket, turn am inside out, show say na small change dey there. Meanwhile, my full salary dey for my back pocket.

I dey pray make she no get long hand reach that side. I dey shine teeth, dey pretend say all man dey broke. As I dey do like say I dey happy, my heart dey beat kpom kpom.

"Ehen, you really no carry money." She talk half playfully, "Big man like you, waka without cash—e good so? If wahala burst, how you go do?"

Na so e be. Lagos no dey smile for person wey no get backup. She dey teach me coded lesson for street.

"Abeg, which wahala go burst? This na law-abiding country. For day time, nothing fit happen."

As I talk am, everybody for my side burst laugh. For Nigeria, na who get long leg and sense dey waka jeje. My own na just mouth.

"Heh... University boys sabi talk. Make I ask, as I dey look you, you never do am before, abi?" 25 laugh, come use hand tap me for that side.

Her hand cold, but e heavy like she wan check something. I jump small. I dey reason whether she dey see through me.

"How that one go be? This one no be olden days again." I rush cross my leg, dey feel somehow.

Na true, my own na book. Street no too dey my blood. I dey form big boy, but na pure jejely pikin I be.

"Abeg, stop to form. As I enter, I know say something dey. See ehn—make big sister check for you? This one go free, no pay."

She wink. Her mouth dey run but I fit see say she just dey enjoy herself. For her mind, she fit dey pity me, or just wan make my head swell.