Chapter 5: Market Gist and Foxy Schemes

"You hear wetin happen? Today for Christ Redeemer Monastery, Vigilance Division accuse Father Onyekachi say e get spirit energy, say e don follow spirit road. Chief vex—close monastery for seven days, wan put the father for council case."

Market side dey hot, gist dey fly like mosquito. Women dey chop puff-puff and sip zobo, mouth nor dey rest.

"I hear am o. Everybody dey talk. Princess Morayo kneel, beg for am, cry sotey her eye red. Na Spirit Seers save Father Onyekachi—if not, e for don finish."

People dey tap each other, dey shake head. Some dey talk say palace guards no dey sleep again.

"No matter wetin people talk, Father Onyekachi really dey follow God. Princess Morayo love am sotey, but e no even look her side."

Na that kind story wey dey sweet women for roadside to gist, dey whisper as if dem dey talk secret for village well.

"Shhh! You wan die? Lower your voice. If guards hear, na wahala."

Gist for Naija na sport. But if council wahala enter, everybody dey whisper.

I finish my roast chicken for roadside, drop some naira, waka comot.

Na so I dey behave—hear finish, waka. If trouble dey ground, fox dey look road well.

From all the gist, I piece everything together.

Spirit nor dey miss code. If I hear half, I fit complete story for my mind.

Princess Morayo, wey dey craze for love, go drug the monk, wan force herself on am. The monk manage escape, run back Christ Redeemer Monastery, then jam me—na so that madness happen.

The kain love wey dey do some people. Palace pikin dey do anyhow because power dey her back.

I just add Princess Morayo to my blacklist. One night, I go enter palace, help her bald her head!

Spirit no dey forget. If I catch her, na only razor go remain for her hair.

Before night, I go back Christ Redeemer Monastery, head to Father Onyekachi poor room.

If to say dem dey do security well, I no suppose reach gate. But my spirit sharp—na so I waka reach.

At first, I wan just burst enter, but I reason say make I check well first.

You know say wahala dey come in twos. Na only mumu rush enter lion den.

I quietly open window small, peep inside.

My nose dey first enter, then eye. Fox spirit no dey rush enter room anyhow.

Father Onyekachi still dey sit for bed, same cassock like yesterday, leg cross, dey meditate.

Na only serious person fit dey one place two days. Na so dem dey train for monastery.

But that bed wey almost scatter last night, don neat again, bedding fold, no sign say fight happen.

No single pillow out of place. E mean say monk sabi clean pass dry cleaner.

I squint, na so I see my waist pendant dey for Father Onyekachi hand.

The way e dey hold am, e be like say e dey reason big decision.

...

How I go collect am back?

E go pain me if I rush in, dem catch me again.

I no fit fight am.

For this one, na brain pass power. If I use force, na lose I go lose again.

After I reason, I jump climb baobab tree for outside him door, hide there.

My leg dey shake, but I dey hold branch tight. Fox nor dey fall anyhow.

I no believe say e no go ever go toilet.

Na so I plan. Who fit meditate for twenty-four hours without break?