Chapter 3: Envy and Black Notebooks

Half month before university entrance exam, my classmates dey bury head for book. Only me different. Everyday, I go just dey sit for class, dey look textbook, but my mind dey think how I go kill Ifeoma without anybody know.

For class, dem dey talk say stress dey worry me. Some people dey pity me, some dey avoid me. Only Ifeoma go dey drag me for hand, say make we read together. If only she sabi wetin dey my mind, she for run from me like snake.

For people eye, I be Ifeoma best friend. For three years, we no dey separate for school—even toilet we dey go together. Ifeoma na correct student—her result dey always top, she fine, her character dey sweet. Teachers and parents dey use her do example. Me, I dey average for everything—my result no too good, I no too fine, I dey shy. In short, me and Ifeoma be opposite.

Her skin dey shine like fresh mango. If she enter class, everybody go notice. Me, I dey melt into background. Even for assembly, if they call our names, na her people dey clap pass. But I no dey jealous her beauty—na her brain I dey eye.

The reason why Ifeoma choose me as friend na because I too ordinary. My own ordinary dey make her own shine more.

She go tell people, "Na my padi be this, she dey loyal." But na lie. She dey use me take do example of how life suppose balance: if you too shine, make you carry one person wey dull follow body, so people go know say you no dey proud.

I don know since say Ifeoma dey talk bad about me for back. She say I no sabi book, I dey dull, I dey smell medicine. If no be say she pity me, she for dump me since.

Sometimes, if I waka pass, I go hear her voice for back—"You see that my friend? Na only God fit help her." The thing dey pain me, but I no let am show. I just dey nod and smile, dey bide my time.

Ifeoma dey right—my family really get wahala. My papa die when I small. My mama raise me alone, work tire, now she dey use medicine steady just to survive. But all those things no concern me again. I no send wetin Ifeoma think. After all, I no even really wan be her friend.

Sometimes, as I dey chop garri for house, I go dey remember how Ifeoma dey use rice and chicken shine for break. My throat go dry, but my eye dey red. But hunger no fit kill my mind—my own eye dey red for another thing.

I first notice Ifeoma during that first test for secondary school. She carry first for the whole grade. From that day, I put her name for my candidate list. I dey fear say her result fit drop for the three years. I dey update my list every term, but to change target halfway dey hard. Luckily, Ifeoma result never drop. Even the last mock exam before university exam, she still dey top five. She no even bother to try competition wey fit give her automatic admission. For me, Ifeoma na the perfect person. Whether I fit jump from ordinary university to big one—all depend on her.

I get one black notebook wey I dey hide under my mattress—na there I dey write names of people wey fit help me for future. Sometimes, I go tick some names, sometimes I go cancel. But Ifeoma own, na big star I put for her name. She be like golden ticket.