Chapter 2: Suspicion and Silent Tears

Wetin dey your pocket?

Ifedike look up, him lips tight like say e no wan talk.

His eye red, not just from slap, but from all the wahala he dey carry for head. The guy stubborn, but today I sure say he go talk true or something go spoil.

The guy skin dey light before, but after that slap, two red hand marks just dey shine for him face. E really dey show.

People wey pass for corridor go think say na masquerade dey rehearse festival for our room.

I flex my hand, e dey pain me, but I still repeat, “Wetin dey your pocket?”

I dey wait, chest up like soldier for parade ground, even as my hand dey vibrate like person wey chop kpokpo garri without water.

[LOL, this madam wahala really think say after all this slap, Odogwu still go propose? 😂]

[No wahala, our fine geh go soon come console Odogwu. Las las, heartbreak na breakfast.]

[If madam wahala no dey always find wahala, she for no be madam wahala.]

Even for group chat, my so-called friends dey add salt and pepper to the matter. Some dey drop emoji, some dey analyze like relationship expert for radio.

Anybody wey get sense go understand wetin all these comments dey talk.

Even my neighbour Mama Ukamaka dey outside, she dey look window, dey call her sister for phone, 'You hear say Amaka slap her boyfriend two times today?'

So na me be that madam wahala, abi?

I dey ask myself, if na me really get wahala or na all these palava just dey follow me like ogbanje.

Me and Ifedike just dey look each other, nobody wan gree.

Inside that silence, I fit hear my own heartbeat, and the clock for wall wey dey tick like say e wan count my mistakes one by one.

E be like today, him no go bring out that ring at all.

As I dey look am, hope wey I get before just dey melt like ice block for sun.

Phone wey dey plastic table begin ring—na Ifedike own.

The ringtone na one old Wizkid song, 'Ojuelegba', e loud reach street, but nobody move to pick am.

I just sigh, I no wan stress am again.

I just shift face, dey avoid him eye, make this drama no too long. My spirit dey weak.

Abeg, go answer your call.

My voice small, like say mosquito dey sing for my throat. I just wan comot from scene, no strength to quarrel again.

I turn go bedroom.

My leg heavy, but I force myself. As I dey waka, I dey drag one leg after another. For my mind, wahala don tie wrapper sit down for our house today.

From corner of my eye, I see the name wey show for the phone screen.

My heart skip. I see am clear, and cold pass through my body.

Nnenna.

That name long for my ear, like church bell for Sunday morning. My body just dey shake.

E no fit be guy, abi?

As I dey reason am, I dey count all the men wey I sabi for his circle, but none dey answer Nnenna. Na babe name be that.

I remember that day Mama Chidi dey whisper for corner say one fine girl dey always call Ifedike late night. Na this one be the main babe wey all those comments dey talk about?

For this life, e get some things wey you go suspect, but you no go believe till you see am with your eye. The feeling bitter for my tongue.

If I say e no pain me, na lie.

My pride dey try form strong, but inside me, pepper dey my chest. To think say after all wey we don share, na another woman dey call am at this kind time.

Me and Ifedike don know each other for five years, we date for three.

This love wey dey scatter, na journey o. People dey think say Naija love easy, but e dey come with as e dey hot.

Both of us na normal people. After we finish NYSC, we stay for this city dey hustle.

We manage our small allowance, dey try survive. Sometimes, garri and groundnut na dinner. Other times, we dey dream say we go hammer one day, build our own house for GRA.

To save money, we move in together.

E no easy to blend. We dey quarrel over soap, who go fetch water, who go pay NEPA bill. But all those things join us together.

The apartment small, but everything inside, na both of us pick am together.

Even the old foam wey get spring, na from second-hand market we buy am. E get as e be, but na our own.

We dey treat am like temporary home, decorate am well, even carry one small cat join body.

That cat, Sisi, dey always sleep for middle of bed. If trouble start, na she go first run hide under cupboard. Sisi sef don witness many fight, I sure say if she fit talk, she for tell me, 'Madam, cool down.'

I look round this our small house, e dey pain me to let go.

I remember when we buy those yellow curtains from Wadata market, the way Ifedike tease me say I too like bright color. Those moments dey scatter for my mind.

Maybe soon, all these things go just be memory.

The thought dey heavy me, like big stone wey dem tie for my chest. Memories dey choke person pass food sometimes.

I lie down for bed, tears just dey rush come out, I no fit hold am.

Na only generator noise and mosquito dey keep me company, as darkness swallow our small room. Sisi, the cat, come rub my leg, purr like she dey beg for suya, her whiskers tickle my leg. I hold pillow, try choke cry so neighbours no go hear.

As I expect, I soon hear door open and close for parlour.

Na the kind silence wey follow person commot. No footsteps, just hush, as if him dey try waka on top egg.

Ifedike don go find another person.

I imagine am outside, maybe with Nnenna, dey gist, dey laugh. E pain me well well.

As I realize am, I no fit hold myself again, I burst cry.

My body dey shake, I no even care if Sisi waka commot go sleep for parlour. Pain no dey let person reason well.

My chest just dey pain me like say dem tie am.

No air to breathe, my voice dey croak, like frog wey fall inside hot water.

So na so my first love take end.

I remember all the sweet promises, the way him dey call me 'my Amaka', e dey pain me. Na so this our gist go end?

Wuwuwu...

I cry sotay my voice crack, snot dey come out nose. Sisi just dey look me like 'Na you sabi.'

I cover my face, but tears no dey hide for face-me-I-face-you. Tomorrow, my pain go become their morning gist.