Chapter 5: Office Games and Cold Coffee
After Tobi finish talk, everywhere quiet.
Pin drop silence. Even music wey dey play before, DJ low volume. My friends dey shift leg, dey look ground, dey wait make I react.
All our friends dey look me, dem dey uncomfortable.
One of my girls try give me eye signal, like say make I no mind Tobi. Another one just dey play with her ring, dey avoid my eye.
I look up at Tobi, for that moment, the man wey I spend eight years with just dey like total stranger.
I search his face for any sign of the Tobi I know, but na cold wall I see. Him eye no soft again, him mouth set like person wey dey guard secret.
As I glance reach Halima side, she just shrink behind am like scared rabbit.
She squeeze her bag for lap, eyes wide. E be like say she dey fear make I slap her. But me, I no get energy for violence.
Tobi frown, come use body block her.
He spread shoulder, face me direct. Na clear warning. As if say I be troublemaker for market.
“Amara, this no be office. No carry your bully-newcomer style come here.”
He talk am loud. I hear small 'hmm' from one side. Shame wan swallow me.
Hehn.
I just laugh small, but the laugh cold.
Na that kind laugh wey pain dey inside. My voice crack, but I keep my pride.
I drop my glass, carry my jacket from back of chair. “I don pay already. Una enjoy.”
I no even look back. I just gather my things with style. I adjust my jacket, head up.
“I dey go.”
My voice low, but clear. Na so I make my waka, even though my leg dey shake.
As I waka pass them, I see Tobi give me one kind look wey I no fit explain.
Him eye follow me reach door, but I no fit read am. Maybe regret, maybe relief, maybe nothing at all.
As I dey wait for keke outside, my phone ring.
I first look screen, see say na Tobi. I almost no pick.
“Amara, you be reasonable person.”
His tone soft, but e still dey try command respect. E pain me say even after all, na work matter him dey discuss.
“I hope say wetin happen between us no go affect Halima work.”
He pause, like say he dey judge my mind.
“No make life hard for am for office.”
As my keke reach, I just keep my phone, my face blank.
I no even reply. I just put phone for bag, climb keke, face front. As breeze dey blow my face, I vow say I go focus on my own lane.
Halima na the new intern for our company.
She resume few months ago, her CV still dey smell fresh paper. Everybody dey call am small girl, but she dey try hard to impress.
Fresh graduate, everything wey she dey do, she dey fear make she no go make mistake.
She dey always dey check email, dey revise file. Sometimes, she go ask me same question three times. I dey tire, but I still help her.
So sometimes I dey hard for her, but when I see her dey cry for corner, I dey pity am, remember how e be when I first start work.
That day, I see her for toilet dey wipe eye, I just carry tissue give am. I tell am say make she strong, say na so all of us start.
So I dey help her pass others.
I go give her hint on how to write proposal, how to greet client for meeting. She dey thank me tire, call me mentor. I swallow am.
Sometimes, when she no get correct cloth for client meeting, I go buy for her without thinking twice.
I remember one time, I carry her go Balogun market, buy blazer for her. She hug me, dey jump like pikin. I feel proud that day.
I even dey carry Halima follow body when I dey go date with Tobi, just so she fit chop better food.
That time, I just feel say e good make she see better life. Sometimes I go buy her small chops, pay for her Uber home. E no even occur to me say e fit cause problem.
But when things begin change between her and Tobi, I no even notice.
Sometimes, I go see two of them dey laugh for pantry, I go wave, dey join gist. E no ever enter my mind say anything dey happen.
Na when Tobi sick, and I travel for work, I ask her to help me deliver cold medicine?
I remember, I text am, beg her make she pass my house give Tobi drugs. She agree quick, send me picture say she don deliver am.
Or na when Tobi dey hospital for stomach pain, and I dey busy with big contract, she volunteer to dey carry food go meet am every day?
She go dey update me, say 'Aunty Amara, him appetite dey come back.' I go thank her, even pray for her.
I no ever see am coming.
If to say I get small suspicion, maybe I for shine eye. But trust blind me.
I just think say the way dem dey understand each other na because dem like the same things.
I even dey happy say she dey help me, dey support my relationship, no knowing say na my rival dey raise.
But now,
e no matter again.
I don release am from my mind. Wetin don spoil, no fit be again. I just dey focus on how to survive.
After I manage pass night for house, my alarm ring as usual.
I hear that sound, I nearly smash phone. But I know say life no dey pause for anybody. I drag myself get up.
Na adulthood be this.
If you like cry from now till next year, bill go still show. You gats show face, do wetin you fit.
Even if your world scatter, dem no dey give you too much time to cry.
No company go pity you reach two days. I just wear wrapper, brush teeth, force myself chop bread and tea.
I don already take three days off; today, come rain, come sun, I gats show for work.
No excuse again. My boss no dey like slackers. I paint brow, wear my best skirt suit, tie gele tight.
I look myself for mirror.
I see tired woman, but I add small powder, smile small for mirror. I tell myself, 'Amara, no let dem see your weakness.'
Big dark circle dey under my eye.
I rub foundation, try blend am. Still, e dey show. But I adjust, put on red lipstick, boost my morale.
But for tonight promotion dinner, I still package myself well.
My friends dey hype me, say make I shine, say better things dey come. I set my mind, say tonight na my night.
The director resign one month ago, before she go, she recommend me give deputy general manager.
She even call me aside, say 'Amara, I trust you. You go fit carry company.' I dey proud.
By yesterday, my probation don finish, and from the way the deputy dey talk, today dem go announce my appointment as director.
I dey already plan how I go call my papa for village, tell am the good news.
Word don spread for office WhatsApp group, people don dey disturb me for treat.
People dey send GIF, dey hail me, dey ask for suya, shawarma. Even people wey never talk to me before, dey greet me.
We agree say we go that new restaurant for dinner.
I even book table. I send invite to my team, dey plan menu. I dey happy.
Na my treat.
I plan say I go pay for everybody. Make dem chop belle full.
But as I reach office, everybody dey look me one kain.
Some people dey whisper. When I greet dem, dem just nod, face another direction. E surprise me.
Anytime I look their eye, dem go quickly look away.
I dey wonder wetin I do. I check my cloth, check if I stain anywhere. My heart dey pound.
I frown.
I no like nonsense. I adjust my file, arrange my table, dey wait meeting.
As I sit down, na that time Halima waka enter office, wear correct expensive suit, dey walk fast.
Her dressing sharp, pass her level. Even her shoe na designer. E shock me.
Two people follow her, hand full with coffee.
I never see her get this kind respect before. One of the girls dey laugh for her joke, dey call her 'madam'.
She clap hand, dey smile:
“Everybody, una try well well! After work today, no rush go house—I dey treat!”
She talk am with confidence. I dey wonder who give her power. Everybody dey clap, dey hail her.
As she finish, the two people begin share coffee for everybody.
People dey collect coffee, dey thank her. Even my own assistant wey I train, dey join for queue.
When dem finish, everybody get cup—
Except me.
I look my table, e empty. I dey hope say maybe dem forget. But my heart already dey sink.
My mind don dey tell me say wahala dey.
That instinct for my belly no dey ever fail. Na so I know say dem plan this thing.
Na that time Halima act like say she just see me, she come dey apologize:
“Ah, Aunty Amara, you dey here too! Sorry o, I think say you no go come today, so I no buy coffee for you.”
She act innocent, voice sweet. I just smile, no talk. People dey look us, dey wait for my reaction.
She waka come, stretch her own cup:
“I never touch this one. If you no mind, Aunty Amara, you fit take my own.”
I just look her and smile. "No worry, keep your own. I sabi where my own dey come from."
She dey force smile. I see the game, but I no wan give her satisfaction.
As I no collect am, she just force am for my hand. But as the cup touch my finger,
she release am.
The thing shock me. Coffee hot, my hand almost burn. The cup fall, scatter for ground, stain my shoe.
With one loud splash, coffee scatter everywhere for floor.
People gasp. One person rush carry tissue, another dey shout.
“Amara, wetin you dey do?”
Her voice loud. I look her, my mind dey boil, but I hold myself.
Before I fit talk, somebody push me strong.
The push shake my body, I stagger back. I dey look for who do am.
One man step front, block Halima, him eye full with worry:
Na Tobi. Him face tight, he dey glare me like say I wan harm Halima. I just shake my head.
“You dey okay? Coffee burn you?”
He check her hand, dey blow am. I dey watch like movie.
“Oh no, Manager Amara injure!” one colleague shout.
Fake pity. I know say na lie. Dem dey use me do drama for office.
As Tobi look my hand by instinct,
I see small regret for his face, but e vanish quick.
Halima hold him sleeve small, her eyes don already full with tears.
She sob, voice small. "I dey okay...Aunty Amara no do am on purpose."
“I dey okay, abeg no blame Aunty Amara. Na just say her hand no hold am well, she no do am on purpose…”
She dey act victim. I dey watch her, mouth tight.
“No blame her, abeg, no be her fault…”
Everybody dey nod, dey comfort her. Nobody dey ask me how I dey.
Tobi just look another side, pat Halima for head.
He touch her gently, dey whisper for her ear. Na public show, no be real love. My stomach dey turn.
“You too soft. If you continue like this, people go dey use you anyhow.”
He dey talk am like hero, but I dey see through him. Him own manipulation no get part two.
Halima look up, stick out her tongue, smile.
She giggle small, brush tears. Her acting na A1. Everybody dey relax, dey smile with her.
The two of them just dey show love for office…
Na so dem dey, like say dem dey for home. Staff dey look dem with envy, dey gossip small small.
I just dey watch.
I cross leg, adjust my chair. I dey refuse cry. I just dey think, 'see how tables turn.'
So na so love dey shift easy like that.
Life no hard for person wey fit change partner quick. My mind dey replay all the good times, dey compare am to now.
Just some days ago, Tobi still dey care for me like say tomorrow no dey.
He dey help me carry bag, dey call me baby. Now, na Halima dey chop the love. My chest dey heavy.
Now now, he fit carry that same love give another person.
E easy for him. Maybe na me dey hold myself down.
Hehn.
I just shake head—na so life dey, e fit turn anyhow.