My Ex Returned the Day My Wife Broke / Chapter 3: Suspicion and Cravings
My Ex Returned the Day My Wife Broke

My Ex Returned the Day My Wife Broke

Author: Gary Black


Chapter 3: Suspicion and Cravings

I begin suspect say Amaka na fake she dey fake all this her morning sickness, and I even get evidence. Mama Kemi even talk say, "Pregnancy wahala no dey last, na food go win last last."

The thing surprise me because na only sharp change I see. I dey observe her well, dey jot for my mind. Na one night divide when she dey act sick and when she just switch to chop like say dem go ban food.

Na only one night dey between the time wey she dey vomit anyhow and the time wey she just begin crave food like mad.

As I dey sleep, I just hear her voice for kitchen, 'Honey, I wan chop fried yam and egg.' I shock. Na the same person wey dey vomit stew yesterday dey request egg today. E no add up.

Maybe she just tire for the acting.

I dey reason say maybe she see say her own don dey too much, na im make she change script. You know say some women sabi form anyhow.

One morning, as she just wake up, she talk say she wan chop.

Na that early momo, around 6:30, she just tap me for bed: 'Honey, abeg, you fit help me buy bread and akara?' I just weak. Even me wey no get belle, I never think of food that early.

From that day, vomiting just disappear. Instead, she come dey chop like say tomorrow no dey.

Na so everywhere for kitchen begin full—garri, plantain, biscuits. If I open fridge, na her own food full ground. I begin dey calculate how much I dey spend per week.

Na so she go wake me 2am say she wan eat boli and groundnut, or sometimes abacha. I go dey wonder who send me.

Within two months, her weight move from sixty kg to seventy kg.

I dey try adjust but my pocket dey shout. Tailor begin sew new gown for her. The one wey dey pain me be say, na she dey complain say all her old cloths don tight, but na me dey buy new ones.

Seventy kg fit be normal for some girls, but for her, e too much.

You know Amaka short, so the thing just dey obvious. For compound, neighbours dey hail her, 'Amaka, you dey enjoy pregnancy o.' For my mind, I dey vex.

Because she short—only 1.58 meters.

If you see the way her neck dey hide inside fat, you go pity her. Even her slippers begin dey suffer. I just dey count days make she born.

With that kind height and seventy kg, she begin resemble small drum wey dem dey use fetch water from well.

One day my guy, Tunde, see her for street, come call me say, 'Baba, you sure say na one pikin dey inside that belle?' I just laugh cover face, but e pain me.

True true, by five months, na real drum she turn to.

She dey waka dey drag leg like person wey dey carry basin of water for head. Even her own papa dey look her with eye wey talk say, 'You sure say you dey alright?'

Her weight reach eighty kg.

I begin dey fear say if dem weigh her, scale go spoil. I dey joke am for house, say na she go break Guinness Record.

After that one, the thing wey dey fear me pass be say, anytime I carry her go outside, make we no jam anybody wey sabi me.

I dey dodge my own friends like say I thief something. For mall, I go dey hold cap low, dey avoid greeting anybody. I dey sweat for under AC, dey pray make we no jam my area boys or church member. Na small thing remain, I for dey carry scarf join.

Anytime we see person wey know me, I go just dey find where to hide.

You know how Lagos be—everywhere, person fit jam old padi. My body go just dey tense anytime she say make we go out. I dey sweat like goat.

But her own different o.

Amaka no send anybody. In fact, she go waka like say na beauty queen parade. I go dey beg her, 'Baby, abeg make we do am online.' She go just laugh.

The more I no wan carry her go out, the more she dey insist say she must go out.

Na so she go dey vex, dey shout say I dey try hide her. 'You dey shame me?' she go ask. I go just dey form smile, dey cover up.

If no be today na baby bathtub, tomorrow na diaper. Everyday, she get new thing wey she must buy from Mama Kemi’s shop.

One day, I even dey tell her make we buy everything once. She go talk say, 'No, each pikin dey get her own size.' As if I no go school.

Wetin really confuse me be say, by third month, she already know say na girl she carry.

I dey suspect say maybe na scan, maybe na spirit tell her. But as she dey talk am everywhere, all my aunties dey hail her—'Na correct woman!'

Person like her—wey dem dey call 'money-miss-road pikin'—why she dey bother herself like this?

If you see Amaka background, you go understand. Her papa and mama hustle tire, get estate for Lekki. But she no dey carry shoulder like all those ajebo girls. E surprise me.

Her papa and mama work tire, gather all those houses, but as dem born only daughter like her, no be me go collect everything later?

Omo, if to say na some men, dem for just dey relax. But na so she dey run up and down, dey buy this, dey buy that. For my mind, I dey thank God say at least her people dey try for us. My own sef dey there.

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