Chapter 2: Cheap Lagos Miracles and New Wahala

I dey do online media work, just start, the money no even reach anything serious.

Every day na struggle, but as long as data dey my phone, I dey hustle small freelance jobs. Most time na to dey refresh email dey hope say another alert go show.

Food, cloth, house rent, transport—I dey manage every kobo.

Sometimes, na bread and beans dey save life. Clothes sef, if I wear am pass three times, na only me go know. Transport, I sabi all the danfo wey go drop me for junction without collect full money.

Na why I find house wey cheap die.

I waka enter agent office, tell am say "Oga, I no wan big thing o, just make I dey safe." As he mention the price, my mind already dey do thanksgiving.

Old building, sixth floor, no lift. As for the inside ehn...

If you see staircase ehn, you go believe say na Mount Kilimanjaro. Person fit lose breath before reach room.

If you call am basic, you dey try. If you call am rundown, you dey even try pass.

All the windows dey do kpraaa if breeze blow. If you see kitchen sink, e dey leak small water. Paint don peel for corner. Mosquito own turf.

Everything dey, but most of the things don spoil or dem just dey manage.

But na life, as long as fan dey blow, and window dey open, I dey cope. My speaker dey work, so I fit play Wizkid at least. Ceiling fan dey chop air, but sweat still dey my back—Lagos heat no dey joke.

Luckily, I be guy—no too get wahala. As long as roof dey my head, I dey alright.

Who dey look gold-plated tap? If rain fall and I dey inside, I dey grateful. I just dey do my own, no dey find trouble.

Rent na just one hundred and fifty thousand naira per month for two rooms and parlour—na pure awoof, like say dem dey dash me.

For this Lagos? Omo, na miracle. I even check receipt two times. Agent sef dey look me with side-eye.

Halima rent here too because e cheap. Plus, her office just five minutes waka.

Na so I first meet am. She carry one small Ghana-must-go, waka enter like person wey life dey humble.

Since she move in come dey share house with me, my life just dey turn wahala everyday.

Na one new adventure every day. If I no dey find missing charger, na to dey hear her dey argue with customer care for phone. Life no dull.