Chapter 17: Growing Pains, Fading Ties

Third year Amina dey with me, she just stopped to come.

Her absence sharp ache, gap I no fit fill.

Queen mother said Amina don old, prepare marriage for house, no fit stay palace.

I nodded, heart broke small.

I sad, nothing I fit do.

I cried in private, holding her last note.

As I wan give Tola Shun sachet Amina gave me, queen mother collected.

She tucked it away, promised to keep safe. I wiped tears, pouting.

She scolded, punished me to copy book.

Fingers cramped, I wrote, remembering Amina’s laughter.

Then I moved back Royal Hall. Now, Tola Shun sit main desk, queen mother and me get desk down.

Hall quiet, air heavy with books. I missed days of laughter.

But I no dey sit long, because queen mother and Tola Shun dey quarrel more.

Voices echoed, sharp. I learned to slip away, unnoticed.

At first, queen mother told me go. Now, as I see quarrel, I waka.

I grew wise, slipping out before heat.

After half year, queen mother stopped to attend council.

Palace felt emptier. I missed her sharp tongue, laughter.

When I reached fourteen, Tola Shun sixteen, he got real power.

Voice deep, eyes older. Courtiers bowed, servants moved faster.

I no need go Royal Hall read again.

I celebrated, skipping halls, free from endless lessons.

But before I enjoy, queen mother dragged me go learn palace management.

Her lessons hard, patience thin. I stumbled, determined to make her proud.

She taught serious, I slow to learn.

I tried, but numbers and rules twisted my head.

One evening, after lesson, I jammed Tola Shun for road.

He waited by garden, face shadowed by moon. I joined, silent.

He sent young Baba to tell queen mother say he go greet later.

Young guard nodded, bowed.

Then he followed me, as we waka road I don waka plenty, sadness caught me.

Garden smelled of hibiscus and rain. My heart ached with memories.

I said, "Why your papa no trust my papa? You feel say my papa fit betray country?"

Voice trembled.

He said, "Ifeanyi Tangola, you no wan stand by my side?"

Words soft, almost pleading. I hesitated.

I said, "No."

Word slipped, sharp.

He looked long, then said okay.

He turned away, unreadable.

I wanted to say I miss mama, miss Guanguan, palace rule too much, I no fit learn all.

Words stuck, heavy as stone.

But before I talk, he waka go.

I watched him disappear, heart heavy.