Chapter 3: No Shame, Just Forward
Of course, I no foolish reach to dey argue with the comments.
Na dem sabi. People for social media always get mouth.
I just look Tobi, small confusion for my face. "Anything else?"
I talk am softly, but my eye dey watch him like say I dey wait for exam question.
He frown, sweat just dey his pale forehead.
You go think say na him dey fry akara for kitchen with the way sweat full him face.
His eyes deep, with small vex for inside.
If eye fit burn person, I for don turn suya for there.
Tobi fine no be small.
E get as e be—the kind of fine wey make girls dey trip from church choir to NYSC camp.
In fact, na him fine pass.
No lie, if dem do beauty contest for boys, na him go carry first, second, and third.
If not, you think say I for dey chase am like that?
If na person wey resemble Okoro, that my uncle son, I for don rest. But Tobi get that sharp jawline and smile wey dey melt person heart.
Nine confessions—the last one na after WAEC finish.
After that last paper, everybody dey jubilate. Me, na only Tobi I dey reason.
I tell am, "Now we don finish school, you fit give me chance?"
My voice even dey shake small. For my mind, na do or die.
I smile, my eyes bend, hope full my face.
I dey use that innocent look wey my mama say dey work for her when she dey young. Na so hope dey my face like pikin wey dey wait for gala.
But he just shake head. "We no fit."
The way he talk am cold ehn, na only ice block sure pass.
The first eight times, na say make I no disturb his studies. The ninth time, na another excuse.
E go say, "Abeg, I dey read for NECO." Or, "My mama go vex if she hear." All those kind story.
For my last life, I even wan give up.
But then, comments begin flash for my front.
I listen to them, look back.
Truly, I see his cold eyes dey shine with emotion.
That small glint—like person wey dey hide tears but no wan gree.
Dem talk say na pride dey worry the main guy, say he feel he no reach my level.
Sometimes, pride na real wahala. Especially for boys wey no too get. Na ego dey block their sense.
So, I follow am go the city wey he go university, suffer the same way as him.
I hide my papa name, manage with small money, even eat beans and bread for breakfast. All because of love.
Till the tenth confession, when he finally gree.
E shock everybody that year. Even my auntie shout for phone.
"I dey plan go school for Port Harcourt."
Tobi voice bring me back to reality.
As I look up, na only his back I see.
E walk away sharp-sharp, no even wait for my reply.
My slippers dey slap ground—kpra kpra—like say I wan chase sorrow comot. But sorrow no dey run, e dey wait for corner, sharp as ever.