Chapter 3: Night Call and New Resolve
When I comot library, everywhere don dark. Night cover everywhere, streetlamp near gate dey shine small. Harmattan breeze dey blow, my cardigan no even help much.
As I on the phone, e dey ring as if network just return for village. Missed calls everywhere, my notification bar full—all from Tobi. The thing shock me. For two years, I dey beg this guy to call. Na now e remember say my number dey his phone? This na the first time in two years wey he dey call me first. If dem say na prank, I for believe. But na true.
As I wan ignore am, Tobi call again, and my hand slip, I mistakenly pick. For my mind, I dey vex say I no just let am ring out.
Tobi voice cold like person wey dem just wake from bad dream. No greeting, no smile. Straight to business.
"You block me for WhatsApp?"
I answer calmly, "Yes, e dey pain my eye, so I delete am."
My hand dey shake, but I no let am hear for my voice. I talk am like say na nothing. My voice steady, but inside, my heart dey run marathon.
He quiet small, then him voice rise: "Wetin? You dey vex?"
E shock me say na this one dey pain am. I just laugh, small wickedness dey my mind.
I laugh small. "Why I go vex? If you don find happiness, I happy for you. I wish you and your babe long life together."
The laugh wey escape from my mouth weak me. I talk am with sugar for tongue, but salt dey under.
As I finish, I fit hear something break for the other side. For the other end, e be like say Tobi throw something. I hear faint sound. My ear sharp.
Tobi voice just freeze: "Morayo, you even know wetin you dey talk?"
E sound like person wey dey try hold tears, but pride no gree am.
"I know, Tobi. Make we no contact again."
I talk am slow, every word clear and strong.
Tobi quiet for long, then laugh one kain, him voice no get feeling.
"Morayo, you just be like every other person."
E talk am like say e dey judge me, like say na crime I commit.
He hang up, and bullet comments burst everywhere.
[Wetin dey happen? No be now dem suppose dey enjoy couple life? Why everything just scatter?]
[The main babe dey do too much. The guy love her, why she no fit just give in small?]
[True talk! If na me get this kind fine, broken guy, I go love am no matter wetin he do.]
[Abeg, no be only me think say the guy dey wrong? For relationship, trust na the koko. To dey test person no good.]
[You wey talk that one, wetin you sabi? The guy na so because e parents separate when e small. The main babe suppose show am more care.]
My vision dey blur as I waka go hostel, but I gats keep face straight. People fit see my eye, but dem no go fit see my heart. After all, na person wey I really love. How I no go feel am?
As for wetin dem talk about Tobi parents, I hear am from him sister last year. I just dey reason am as small pikin wey life deal with. I try show am patience, dey support am. But how long person go do Mother Theresa? Na why I tolerate am reach this level. If no be say I get small pity for am, I for don waka since.
But truth be say: you no fit save another person. This life na only God fit change person. If you try force am, na you go suffer pass. We no fit drag person comot from darkness; na we go follow enter the pit. If you no take time, na two of una go lost inside.
And all this talk say Tobi love me—I never feel am at all. If na love, make I see evidence. E no dey show. Na only talk and silence.
If he love me, he no go dey ignore my messages for two years. Love dey reply, even if na 'LOL' e send. If he love me, he no go forget our dates every time, dey make me wait three hours for cinema inside harmattan breeze. I remember one time I wear new wig, dey wait am for Ikeja cinema. Three hours for cold breeze—no call, no text. My teeth dey shake, yet I dey hope say e go show. If he love me, he no go keep quiet when classmates dey laugh me say I dey dream. All those side talk for class, he just dey look away. E pain me reach bone.
All my memories just dey show say he no love me. If love dey there, e suppose clear like sunlight for dry season.
True waka no dey happen suddenly. Heartbreak na process, e dey cook slow like beans for local pot. Na small small disappointment dey pile up. E dey start with small forgetfulness, small lie, small silence. Before you know, e don full basket.
I dey ask myself if na forgiveness go change am. But deep down, I sabi answer. Once trust break, e no dey patch again. You fit try, but e no dey work. I no want spend my future dey explain and prove myself every time. I dey value my peace pass any love wey dey drag me backward. My joy na my own.