Chapter 6: Beg for Your Life
As I dey waka go the guest room corridor, I no even know how many deep breaths I don take.
I dey talk to myself inside head: "Baba God, abeg, no let this night be my last for house."
The only thing wey dey console me be say the man dey busy for bathroom, so I get like one or two minutes before he start.
I dey pray make light no go off now. If gen stop, wahala fit double.
But to face killer no easy.
I dey feel like person wey wan go fight masquerade with bare hand. My legs dey shake.
I no fit just tell am to comot, so I need find excuse.
For Lagos, you no dey face mad person with empty hand. Na wisdom go save you.
Lucky say no other guest dey that night. I knock the door, hear movement inside.
Na God hand. If other guest dey, na another story we for dey talk now.
Then, the peephole dark—the guy dey look me.
My skin dey crawl. E be like say him dey suspect everybody.
My heart dey beat sotey I wan piss, but I try hold myself.
If I mess up, na my obituary go dey Guardian next week.
"Who be that?" him voice low from inside.
The way he talk, e cold. My mouth dry, but I force words out.
"Na me, owner," I answer quick. "Oga, abeg open door, urgent matter dey."
I try sound humble, dey beg as if my life dey for him hand—which e dey, truly.
After few seconds, door open small, chain still dey. I see the man, towel tie for waist, like say him wan bath.
I peep small, dey check for knife, dey check for anything wey fit harm me.
Him don remove mask, so e make am look less suspicious.
But e still dey give me that wicked eye, like say he dey read my plan.
I see some marks for him face, but I no fit look too much.
E be like say e don fight before. I swallow spit, dey pray inside.
I form worry, deliver the story wey I plan.
I dey act like say e pain me well, my face squeeze, my hand dey shake for effect.
"Oga, abeg no vex, but I just hear say police wan raid this street. Small guest house like us na their target—abeg, you know how e be. Sorry, boss."
I dey twist my mouth, dey look ground, dey rub hand together. I dey act like say I fear pass my shadow.
As I talk, I return his money, dey beg well.
I open envelope, bring out all the notes, even the old one. I dey use mouth beg, dey use hand give.
"Oga, abeg, na beg I dey beg. Police wahala no dey sweet for anybody. Just collect your money, make you help me."
As I mention police, I see his face change small.
E do like say e wan vex, but e hold am. Na so I know say my plan dey work.
But he balance quick. "Raid? Wetin concern me? This no be beer parlour."
He try form strong man, but I see small fear for eye. I dey encourage myself.
"Oga, na because una no get ID. If police check, wahala go dey for both of us. I dey beg you, abeg."
I nearly kneel down. My voice dey tremble. I dey act like say police na my own worst enemy.
I surprise myself, acting like say I get sense for crisis.
My mind dey hail me: "Correct guy!"
After I finish, I add two thousand-naira more. "Oga, take this for cab. Police dey come soon, abeg no vex."
The small bribe na for extra ginger. Make e no vex, make e go quick.
The man quiet, just dey look me, cold eyes like say he dey read my mind.
I dey sweat, leg dey shake, I no fit move, I no wan make am suspect me.
If I move anyhow, na knife fit show for my neck.
Seconds dey drag like years. I no wan rush am—na killer I dey talk to. If I provoke am, na my own be that.
I dey count my breath, dey say Hail Mary inside my heart. Na only God fit save me.
Just as my fake smile wan freeze, the man talk.
I for shout for joy if no be say I dey fear.
"Okay, I dey go now. But she don drunk, she go stay. I go come back for her later."
As e talk am, e look me well, like say he dey read my mind. I just dey nod like agama lizard.
He collect all the money, bang door close.
The sound nearly burst my ear. Na so I waka quick go reception before I faint.
I nearly crawl go reception.
My leg weak, my head dey spin. I carry chair sit, dey thank God say I survive first round.
Even though the man no carry the woman body, I no even get strength—or liver—to argue.
If I try talk, I fit no live see tomorrow. Na so I just surrender.
As long as he no do am here, I dey thank God o.
Omo, na so e be for Naija—anyday wey you survive, thank your star.
No too long, the man really waka go, dress like before, bag for shoulder.
I watch am from window, dey pray make e no change him mind come back. As e disappear for street, my mind cool small.
Before he comot, he pick one business card from my table.
I dey watch, dey wonder why him need my card. E get plan?
"Na your number be this?"
I nod quick, say na me.
I talk am loud, but my voice dey shake. I dey wish make the ground open swallow me.
"Okay, I go call you later."
As him talk, I just dey say "Amen" for my mind. Make that call no ever come.
Na when I see am waka comot for night, my mind calm small. I sit down, breathe, light cigarette.
I smoke am like say e go wipe fear comot for my body. My hand dey shake, but I force am.
After I calm down, I begin reason.
My head dey clear small, but wahala still dey my mind. This kain matter no dey end like film.
The main wahala don pass, but problem still dey.
Body dey inside room, na only God know wetin go happen next.
The woman body still dey room—wetin I go do?
I dey look camera, dey look phone. I dey wish say person go just wake me from dream.
To call police now na the best move.
I dey reason say if I call now, dem fit save me from bigger wahala.
The body never spoil, so police fit no search too deep.
Na so dem fit just believe say na bad luck reach my side.
I fit talk say na news alert me, na why I trick the guy comot. E fit work.
E mean say I be hero for story. My name go clean.
As for the ID matter, na small thing. E fit be like say I dey make up for my mistake.
For this country, na small bribe dey solve ID wahala. I dey plan my defense.
But as I wan call police, I stop.
I dey fear. Wetin if the guy still dey close? Wetin if e dey watch me? My hand dey shake.
If police no catch the guy nko? The guy go still dey outside. Wetin I go do?
I dey reason say if e find out say I run him matter, na my own finish be that.
He go know say na me report am. I go fit run guest house again?
The street go hear am—owner wey dey snitch, who go lodge for my place again?
That kind man na killer. Police no fit protect me forever. As long as he dey free, I go dey fear.
For Lagos, police fit forget your case after one week. I go dey live like thief.
If one day he come find me, I die, who I go blame?
Nobody go cry for me. Na so street life be.
As I reason, I feel say the safest na to act like I no know anything.
I fit close my eyes, pretend say nothing happen. Na so dem dey survive for Lagos.
No be him talk say he go come back for the woman?
I dey pray make e come carry the body go. Na so my mind dey calm.
I go wait make he carry the body go, or wait one or two days, then I fit "accidentally" open door and call police. That way, he no go suspect me.
If e no come back, I fit form say I just discover am. E go save me from wahala.
As I decide, I just sit for door, no collect any customer again, dey wait for am to return.
I lock reception, off all light, just dey look camera, dey check phone, dey listen for every small sound for corridor.
But I wait, wait, till morning, still no see am.
My eyes red, I never sleep. Hunger dey catch me, but I no fit chop. Fear no gree me rest.
As sun rise, heat begin catch everywhere.
The generator dey hum for background, but the heat from morning sun dey make everywhere choke.
NEPA don bring light, but the heat from the dead body fit cause wahala. My mind dey run up and down.
Na that time I realize another wahala: the forecast talk say today go hot well. Wetin go happen to the body?
If body begin dey smell, neighbors fit begin dey talk. E go be another level of wahala.
Dead body go soon begin smell.
I dey imagine flies everywhere, maggot go dey crawl. Abeg, make this thing no spoil my life.
If the smell spread, no be only that room, my whole guest house don spoil.
For Lagos, if one place get bad reputation, na so everybody go avoid you. I dey fear make my name no enter.
I go call police now? But e never reach? The timing no just correct.
If I call too early, dem fit suspect. If I wait, e fit spoil. Omo, wahala get branch.
"God abeg!"
I cry small, my eyes red. I dey beg God make e show me way out.
I curse, hold my phone, my mind just dey scatter.
I dey scroll contacts, dey pray make my spirit show me answer. I dey wish say all this na dream.
Na that time my phone beep with new message.
My body jump, heart dey pound. For this kain time, even mosquito go sound like alarm. I dey fear the worst.
But as I open am, see the text, fear grip me sotey my hand nearly drop phone.
The message flash for screen: unknown number. "I dey watch you. Na your turn soon."
My phone cold for my hand. I fit hear my own blood dey drum for ear. Na so I know say this Lagos no dey ever finish with person.
As I dey look the screen, I dey pray: God of Lagos, abeg, make I no use my leg waka enter grave.