Chapter 3:

But before I even reach the variety show, that night dem don roast me trend for WhatsApp status and Twitter Naija. As I open my phone, generator noise dey hum outside, but na my notification dey make my heart dey skip.

#MovieKingTundePubliclyDragsMorayosVoice#

#MorayoTheFaker#

The trending video na Tunde dey stream game live, get over one million shares for just thirty minutes. People dey cut clips, add voiceover, even remix the thing.

For the video, one teammate dey mess up, dey feed enemy, then come dey apologize with one kind fake, duck-like voice. The voice really get as e be, like say person dey force to sound cute.

Tunde just laugh, begin fire with him sharp mouth:

"Abeg, you swallow garri for your throat to sound like that?"

"If you no fit talk like normal person, abeg, close mouth. Your mouth be like say dem rub am with purging medicine, na rubbish just dey come out."

Tunde na talent—youngest movie king for industry—but him wahala too much. People dey fear am for set, but e dey always get gist for everywhere.

Because e get sharp mouth, nobody fit win am for mouth. E fans dey love and hate am for that reason. Na the type wey if e roast you, you go dey hear am for market for three weeks.

The thing no even concern me—until popular actress Halima drop comment under the video:

"That girl voice sweet die, just like our Morayo for crew."

Na so internet scatter, all eyes turn my Facebook, Instagram, and even TikTok. My DM just dey full, my notifications dey trip like Lagos traffic on rainy day. Even my WhatsApp dey hot.

"No wonder the fake voice sound familiar—na Morayo, entertainment industry number one flirt."

"Who else go dey form like that? She even get mind form for Tunde front. No be everybody sabi say the guy sharp mouth?"

"I no think say na her o. Morayo dey form but no reach like this. People just dey follow talk."

"The person above must be Morayo the Flirt’s paid supporter. If no be her, na Halima? Halima na real babe with sweet voice—original sweet girl. No be the same level."

…

Internet just dey drag me left and right. Dem dig out all my talking videos just to roast me more. Even old clips from my school play dey surface, people dey remix am with memes.

I just dey my house, wahala land on my head. I no fit chop, my chest dey tight, my eyes dey swell. Even my skin dey pepper me, like say I rub Aboniki.

Aunty Kemi vex reach to faint.

"That Halima na real fake babe! Because she fine no mean say I no sabi."

She dey pace for my parlour, her wrapper nearly fall. "Maybe na she dey the video, but she fear make internet people catch am, na why she drag you join."

Since small, I don dey chop dragging because of my voice, but this na first time wey I dey trend for pure hate and mockery. The insult this time long, reach my ancestors.

I vex sotay I just wan disappear, lie down for bed like dead body. I carry pillow cover my face, dey wish make ground open swallow me.

Next thing, my phone ring.

"Morayo, log in! Bro go carry you go canyon, make we slap Tunde for face!" Ochuko voice dey loud for earpiece, as if e dey beside me.