Chapter 5: Lagos Lessons and Office Cruise

I wan give am chance to save face, but the guy just brush my hand hard, my watch knock table, my wrist come dey pain.

That one pain me, but I still try maintain. For Naija, respect for public dey important, even if e pain you.

He turn, point my nose, breath dey smell alcohol, spit dey fly:

“Kunle, I swear, I no rate you at all. You be team lead, your bonus pass everybody own, but na you stingy pass. You no fit even treat woman chop?”

The way e talk am, voice loud, everybody look up. Some girls dey frown, some dey pity me. For Lagos, to shame man for public na heavy matter.

He roll eye, squeeze two words:

“Too local.”

The insult land. I just dey hold myself, dey remind myself say na work setting.

I just shock.

I breathe in, dey control vex. For my mind, I dey rehearse wetin I fit talk if e pass like this.

I for talk say, this thing no good, una still dey young, na me dey earn pass, make I pay.

But I just lock up. For Naija, sometimes na silence dey save person.

But as I see Tunde dey shine face, I just vex.

The vex hit me, e enter bone. I tell myself, today no be for forming.

No wahala, make e dey do hero.

Since e wan do, make I give am stage.

I tell everybody for table:

“See ehn—make I pay for all the guys.”

Voice clear, e shock everybody. Girls pause, guys dey look up, surprise full room.

Young guys just look up, eye dey shine.

E be like say na Christmas come back. Some dey smile, others dey tap leg for under table.

E remind me of uni days, when I go treat hostel for indomie, everybody dey hail me as godfather.

Back then, when I buy crate of egg join, na my room be base. Those days sweet, e dey make person feel like king.

Tunde shock, dey look me:

“How you mean? You go treat the guys, but leave the girls?”

He no believe am. Him eye dey search my face, dey hope say na joke.

I look am:

“No be say I no wan treat girls, but I no wan steal your shine.”

I talk am slow, dey let am sink. Make e understand say, na him own lane be this.

“You dey try use guys own make yourself look good for girls—dey use other people money form big boy.”

Truth be told, e pain me say e dey carry our effort go impress babes.

“Since you too generous and you never let woman pay, abeg, carry all the girls own.”

Room freeze. I drop mic, sit back.